In the beginning...there was a fool. And that fool was me.

Hi.  Welcome to my new blog!


I decided to create this blog with the intention of sharing my music and explaining how I go about writing, recording, etc.  I plan to talk about the inspiration for my songs, post lyrics (I know it's hard to hear them on my videos), and hopefully inspire you to create something beautiful too. 

I figured I'd spend the first post talking about the very first song I shared with the general public (...still remember the feeling of panic as I hit the 'Post' button on Facebook...).  But before I go into too much detail, I guess I should explain my pre-Facebook music.

I began writing songs on the piano back in high school (This is a lie.  I once wrote a song on my violin when I was a kid because I was too poor and didn't have money to buy my brother a birthday gift.  So instead I wrote and recorded a birthday song for him.  Innovation or desperation?)  My first few songs were about my friends, songs about love, songs about my insecurities.  In that realm, I guess nothing has really changed, although I'd like to believe that my songs don't suck anymore.  Hopefully.  The first 5-10 songs I wrote were pretty terrible, but I had to start somewhere.  If you don't believe me, I literally had a song where I referenced the lyrics from "Twinkle, Twinkle" (cue laughing now).  I made a poor attempt to elegantly turn it into a lullaby of sorts, but I failed miserably.  I'll probably just leave that behind and pretend it never happened.  Once I got to college I got a guitar for Christmas and began writing songs on that.  For any fellow musicians out there, you'll probably relate to this: One challenge I have when writing songs on piano is that I fall into patterns: musical patterns, finger patterns, chord patterns, rhythmic patterns, so much that I don't feel like I'm actively writing.  I found that when I picked up a guitar, I had no idea what the hell I was doing and therefore the idea of experimentation was finally unveiled.  I was free of ruts and had to rely on my ear and personal taste as opposed to years of being told, "this chord goes to this chord and you use this inversion and this set of fingers and if you don't do it this way the world will blow up and everyone will die".  Okay, yeah...that's an exaggeration, but you get my point.

I probably wrote about 5-6 songs on the guitar that actually began to sound like songs.  I had built up a little bit of confidence and began sharing them with close friends via AIM (throwback!) to get some feedback.  (Thank you Angela Gan, Kristen LaPorte, Steve Scher, Geoff Geis, Annmarie Beacham Warner, and Dan Gempesaw).  A few of these can be found on 'the book' and eventually I'll post a few of these early songs on here.  One of them includes a setting of e.e. cumming's I Carry Your Heart With Me.  Alas, another day.

I think that's enough history for now.

 My first song.
"Fool of Me" written April 28th, 2011. 
The next sentence I'm about to say is going to be riveting and mind-blowing:

So I wrote this song about a boy.  Ah, the shock you must feel.  In a nutshell, I think we have all experienced the feeling of being led on in some manner.  It sucks.  It really sucks.  Coming out of a four-year-long  failed relationship, I had the misconception that I was ready to dive into another one right away.  I'm thankful I didn't...for many reasons, but for the sake of this story...let me just say that it sparked my first interest in not only writing, but sharing...with you know, a lot of people...aka Facebook.  My parents had recently received a Mac from their friends and I was eager to try out garage band because I'd seen so many of my friends use it.  Well, that was a disaster.  To this day, I have no freaking idea how to navigate garage band - I do not understand.  So instead I downloaded Audacity and have been using that ever since.

In another post, I'll explain my method of writing, but I guess it's pretty obvious that I start with a base and then layer tracks on top of tracks.  So I just started writing a song on the piano, added a vocal line and lyrics, added harmonies, violin, and bam!  I suddenly had a song that incorporated everything I was too scared to say or too afraid to feel.  I remember talking to my best friend, Ang, about the song before I posted it.  She shared some words of encouragement and urged me to post it...so I mustered up some courage and finally did.  And then people started liking it and commenting on it, calling my music "beautiful" and "gorgeous" and I think that's when I realized that my music could mean something, not only to me, but to others as well.

So to end this first post, I'll include the video of my original song, "Fool of Me", along with the lyrics.   Thanks so much for reading and being a part of this.  All of you are an inspiration to me.  I hope my music can inspire you in return.

xo.
Nikia





"Fool of Me" - Nikia Sayre

I know you want more recognition
And I know someday you will find it.
But I can't wait here any longer
I'm no stronger anyway.

I know you never asked me to stay
But I kept hoping things were gonna' change
Now I know for good, I take it back
Cause it hurts so bad.

I gave you everything and I got nothing
You stole a piece of me and now I'm empty
You really made a fool of me.

Of all the things I wanna' say to you
I'll keep my thoughts to myself this time
I gave you all my words, my truths, my fears.


I gave you everything and I got nothing
You stole a piece of me and now I'm empty
You really made a fool of me.

I don't need you, need you anymore
You can't have me, have me anymore
You can't hurt me, hurt me anymore.

I could've loved you
I could've loved you...